Abbott and Costello in the Computer Age

This is from an email I received a long time ago, still makes me laugh:

ABBOT: Super Duper Computer Store... Can I help
you?

COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my
den, and I'm thinking about buying a computer

ABBOT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

ABBOT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy
one.

ABBOT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

ABBOT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look
in the windows?

ABBOT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer
and software.

ABBOT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I
can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What
have you got?

ABBOT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend
anything?

ABBOT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOT: Yes

COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?


ABBOT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOT: I recommend Office with Windows.

COSTELLO: I already have an office and it has
windows! OK, let's just say, I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a
proposal. What do I need?

ABBOT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOT : The Word you get when you click the blue W

COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue w if you
don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch
movies on the Internet?

ABBOT: Yes, you want RealOne.

COSTELLO: Maybe a real one , maybe a cartoon. What
I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need!

ABBOT: RealOne.

COSTELLO: If it's a long movie I also want to see
reel 2,3 & 4. Can I watch them?

ABBOT: Of course.

COSTELLO: Great, with what?

ABBOT: RealOne.

COSTELLO: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to
watch a movie. What do I do?

ABBOT: You click the blue 1

COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?

ABBOT: The blue 1.

COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue w?

ABBOT: The blue 1 is RealOne and the blue W is
Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: But there's three words in office for
windows!

ABBOT: No, just one. but it's the most popular Word
in the world

COSTELLO: It is?

ABBOT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other
Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there.

COSTELLO: And that word is real one?

ABBOT: RealOne has nothing to do with Word. RealOne
isn't even part of Office.

COSTELLO: Stop! Don't start that again. What about
financial bookkeeping? Do you have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOT: Money.

COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

ABBOT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What's bundled to my computer?

ABBOT: Money

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer?
How much?

ABBOT: One copy

COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

ABBOT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy
money?

ABBOT: Why not, they own it.



Hope this made you smile, I still love this :-)

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh I love it! Where where did you find this?!?!

~Robin

Charlotte said...

Oh I love abbot and costello!

so funny!

and yes, made me smile.

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